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The real reasons from The Onion:

Increased demand from oil collectors

More people starting to realize how delicious it tastes

Lack of dinosaurs dying en masse

Paris Hilton seen at red-carpet gala wearing nothing but crude petroleum

Urban children opening oil hydrants to cool down

Wife keeps driving to Kroger’s every day for some goddamn thing

Oil paintings sold in Holiday Inn Express lobbies finally earning respect of art world

Worldwide barrel shortage

Posted by edelfenbein at August 22, 2006 11:43 AM